Often, the most important person in an addict’s turn to recovery is his or her mother, but it’s a perspective that we don’t often hear. In our Infinite Recovery Mom Stories series, mothers of people in recovery have the opportunity to speak firsthand about the pain of having a child struggling with addiction, the love that drives them to seek help for their child and the transformative power of the recovery process.
It may sound bizarre, but finding out my daughter was on drugs was somewhat of a relief. I certainly don’t mean that I was glad she was on drugs—I mean that the turmoil, mood and attitude changes and depression that engulfed her for so long had me terrified that she might be mentally ill.
While there was some solace in knowing the reason for her behavior, it was difficult to fathom that, at only sixteen years old, my daughter was struggling with addiction. I spend countless nights riddled with fear, anxiety and guilt.
How had this happened? Was I the worst parent ever? Thinking about myself only lead me to counterproductive actions: I blamed my daughter’s friends, her school, even her father for her problems. I tried to control her behavior with kindness, bribes, threats and coercion – all of these actions failed. I then had her committed to a psychiatric hospital to try and regain some stability in her life. However, the stability was short lived and within weeks I was watching my daughter move back into crisis mode. I knew I had to do something. I also realized I did not know what actions were needed.
So I made it my mission to find out what she really needed and who could give it to her. I did my research and sent KC to long term treatment facility. I revolted against the petty, whining voice in the back of mind which asked “What will people think?” I took out a second lien against my home to ensure her dad and I could provide the treatment she needed and never looked back.
Naturally, my daughter hated the treatment facility and me and her dad for placing her there. I reminded myself daily during this period that a daughter who hated me was better than a daughter who was dead. I also sought the support and the treatment that I needed to understand what we were facing and stay the course of what needed to be done. My daughter was at the facility nearly 18 months before she graduated.
While the journey was at many times difficult and painful, my daughter has been sober ever since she left long term treatment. The person she is now reminds me on a daily basis that the best thing I ever did was find professionals that knew what they were doing and followed their guidance. My daughter has been sober for 13 years. Her sobriety has allowed us to share a joyful life celebrating her birthdays, graduations, and wedding, and we cherish the future.
Your family can experience the same freedom and happiness that we have. Call Infinite Recovery today at (844) 206-9063 for a free 30 minute consultation with a licensed heroin and opioid specialist.